Once thought taboo, anal sex is now more mainstream than ever. So are
more women having anal sex these days, or are they just more comfortable
admitting that they do?
Men and women have always enjoyed having anal sex. Anal sex for men is
just natural. There are a lot of anal sex positions already, especially gay
anal sex. Generosity, I'm talking about a specific kind of generosity: giving
and receiving oral sex. For all our sexual sophistication, this act still has
the power to make us squirmy. People either want more of it or don't want it at
all or want to receive but not give it or -- you get the picture. Some people
engage in oral sex more often than sexual intercourse. Some view oral sex as
casual and risk-free, while others use oral and anal sex as a way to
technically preserve their virginity.
Although times are changing, some men and women have misgivings about
both giving and receiving oral sex. Not all couples are comfortable with it and
may need some encouragement in this area of lovemaking. Other couples already
enjoy oral sex, but they may be able to use new information to improve their
knowledge. So here are some oral sex tips!
Analingus is defined as oral stimulation of the anus. Some people call
it rimming or anal-oral sex. Most people are either for it or against it. Very
few people are neutral.
Rimming for the guys like having their perineum massaged or caressed
or rubbed during oral sex or intercourse, they love it. Unlike intercourse, in
which you're equal participants, oral sex is usually something one partner
gives while the other receives. It's the giving part -- and the corresponding
power to withhold -- that makes oral sex unique. It's sufficiently socially
acceptable that people feel okay about asking for it -- as opposed to say, anal
sex. But oral sex is still considered enough of an extra that folks can't
complain too loudly if their spouses won't partake very often. Since, it's
human nature to want what's hard to get, it's a small surprise that this one
little act can produce so many tiffs.
How to give oral sex? Giving great oral sex means knowing your
partner's likes and dislikes which is made much easier through communication.
This may seem like an awkward thing to discuss, but done in the right way, it
can simply turn into talking dirty to one another and make things even hotter.
Saying things like "I love when you flick your tongue like that," or
"I love the way you feel in my mouth, do you like when I do this... or
this... baby?" can make things hotter as well as informative.
Oral sex for women have different options, it’s how you and your man
want to finish. Your man could masturbate while you are rimming him. Men who
respond well to rimming say that it really increases the intensity of their
orgasms. Your man may want you to bring your mouth back to his penis to finish
him. If so, you can still use your lubed finger to rub him there while he is
reaching his climax.
Figuring out oral sex isn't brain surgery: it's pretty uncomplicated,
and doing it "right" for a partner just has to do with listening,
being responsive, and being willing to experiment, just like any other kind of
sex.
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It's important to clear up any misconceptions about sex magic before one considers using it. It's not a game nor is it meant to spice up a boring sex life.
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Susan Leigh is a Counsellor and Hypnotherapist who works with stressed individuals to promote confidence and self belief, with couples experiencing relationship difficulties to help improve communications and understanding and with business clients to support the health and motivation levels of individuals and teams
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